Tesla Model S from the press release site https://www.tesla.com/en_GB/presskit

Tesla Dream


It is my dream,
To become green,
Move away from deasil,
As we all know it’s evil.
***
I have a dream,
When I am sleeping,
I drive in my Tesla,
Whenever I wanna.
***
My dream is just me,
And my shiny model 3,
Or maybe an S,
With the leatherness.
***
How about a Roadster,
Where the electric dream is closer,

***
Ether way it’s just a dream,
As I am not rich you see,
And a Tesla Model 3,
Is out of the reaches of me.

Signed Copy of MelonCollie Ravings of a Dyslexic Poet (Hardback)

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Annoying Poem


There is nothing more annoying,
Than a poem,
Where the end doesn’t seem to be flowing.
You read a sweet line,
And all seems just fine,
Then the writer just screws up the ending by not thinking and writing something stupid.

Signed Copy of MelonCollie Ravings of a Dyslexic Poet (Hardback)

Help support the Pesky Poet and get a signed copy of MelonCollie Ravings of a Dyslexic Poet in return. The money raised from the sale of these face masks goes to the funding of the Pesky Poetry site hosting costs while a cut also goes to the commissioned artist.

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Some Little Piggy


Some little piggy,
Went down to the market,
To tend to the market stall,
***
Along came a wolf,
And bought all the beef,
Before leaving the market for home,
***
Poor little piggy,
Thought he was a goner,
But the wolf doesn’t like pork at all.

Signed Copy of MelonCollie Ravings of a Dyslexic Poet (Hardback)

Help support the Pesky Poet and get a signed copy of MelonCollie Ravings of a Dyslexic Poet in return. The money raised from the sale of these face masks goes to the funding of the Pesky Poetry site hosting costs while a cut also goes to the commissioned artist.

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Letter to Hannah Gadsby


Your comedy touched me,
In a way I thought not possible,
The world though the LGBT eye,
Is one often not relatable.
***
I am a quite guy,
A gay white man,
And very shy.
***
I’m often told that I am broken,
Because I don’t take part,
In the parades,
With big floats in.
***
I don’t do pride,
I rather hide,
And watch from inside.
***
So to see your comedy tonight,
Brought a smile to my face so bright,
Thank you for sharing what you do,
Lots of love and thanks to you.

Signed Copy of MelonCollie Ravings of a Dyslexic Poet (Hardback)

Help support the Pesky Poet and get a signed copy of MelonCollie Ravings of a Dyslexic Poet in return. The money raised from the sale of these face masks goes to the funding of the Pesky Poetry site hosting costs while a cut also goes to the commissioned artist.

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Photo by Christopher Campbell on Unsplash

Summer Treat


Summer often brings a treat,
Shirtless men walk down the street,
You can see the in the park,
Or running past the parked cars.
***
A stunning sight for your eyes,
Rippling abs and thick thighs,
Bulging arms and puckering pecs,
With a little drop of sweat.
***
If they notice you trying not to stare,
A nod or wave let’s them know you are there,
A smile back makes it sweet,
That makes my day out on the street.

Signed Copy of MelonCollie Ravings of a Dyslexic Poet (Hardback)

Help support the Pesky Poet and get a signed copy of MelonCollie Ravings of a Dyslexic Poet in return. The money raised from the sale of these face masks goes to the funding of the Pesky Poetry site hosting costs while a cut also goes to the commissioned artist.

£24.99

Hidden Secret


Here I have,
Intentionally hidden,
Deliberately placed,
Deceitfully put,
Encoded in,
Nothing important.
*
So can you see,
Each first,
Character is,
Related to the,
Encoded phrase,
Think you found it?

One to Ten


One two,
sit in my seat,
Three four,
Wait to eat,
Five six,
See the candle sticks,
Seven eight,
Sit up straight,
Nine ten,
Start all over again

English Teacher Tease


I would talk of curtains of blue,
And talk of clouds of rain,
Or the cold of the snow.
*
But I don’t want to give,
English teachers the pleasure,
Of deciphering my work.
*
By the poem what am I saying,
Is it I’m melancholy or,
Just trying to play around.
*
Do your higher English on this,
And try and find where I am,
When I penned this one.

Loo Roll


How many poops,
Are you going to have to do,
Or all the other visits,
To the bathroom,
To use all that paper,
You stock pilled,
While thinking about yourself,
And no-one else,
How many visits,
To your overstocked loo,
Will you have to do,
To clear that conscience,
A stain that even tissue paper,
Cannot wipe away.

Fear Of Friday The 13th


Paraskevidekatriaphobia,
Is a hard word to rhyme,
A word which I’ve never found the time,
But it is a real issue,
That appears,
At least once a year,
That suffers find,
Hard to hide from,
For should the thirteenth day,
Fall on a friday,
As it does today,
On the twelfth month of the year,
People begin to run in fear.

Almost Rude Poem


Poetry is fun,
Poetry is silly,
I can feel poetry in my… hand.
***
Poetry is a goose,
Poetry is a duck,
I can feel I don’t give a… hen.
***
Poetry is a hit,
Poetry makes me sit,
Some people couldn’t give a… verse.
***
Poetry can be blunt,
Poetry can be a stunt,
Poetry isn’t a… hard thing to write.

Ode to Friday


Has anyone ever stopped to think,
How a Friday both is good and stinks.
It starts the weekend and resting,
But all best laid plans end up festering.
You put your feet up and have a drink,
And then you close your eyes and blink.
When you awake it’s Monday again,
Signalling for another week to begin.
Do not fret on the new week in the end,
Because in five days there will be another weekend.

Field Of F#@k$


I plant my seeds with great care,
And lay my time down everywhere,
Make time to love and share,
And foster growth in my field there.
***
Sadly the crop doesn’t grow,
No-one sees and no-one knows,
Around my feet nothing moves,
No fucks are growing beneath my shoes.
***
Not for lack of want or care,
I can’t find a fuck anywhere,
Not a care in the air,
I don’t have a fuck to share.
***
My field of fucks is running barron,
Due to many years of caring,
I would not want to keep carrying,
Other people’s wants and burdens.
***
So when you ask for a fuck from me,
There is nothing in my fuck tree,
Try next season and we will see,
If a fuck will grow for you and me.

What’s In A Name


A name holds the key,
To another persons ID,
The information you need,
If you want to succeed,
A way to know someone,
Out of a crowed of everyone,
And importantly it’s you,
When you are asked who,
And to me it denotes,
I’m the Pesky Poet.

Mountain Hare


There is a cat upon my garden wall,
I don’t know why,
A garden wall is there.
*
Why is that cat upon the wall?
I don’t know why,
I can’t help but stare.
*
Is the cat even there?
I have no proof,
But should I care?
*
Oh, there is no cat upon my wall,
It was just a mountain hare.

With Friends


(c) Friends, The Caterpillar Shivered, 2019

There are days we walk alone,
Quiet with no-one to speak to,
They seem to go on-and-on,
Like an never ending issue.
***
Those days are few,
Thanks to you,
We walk together,
Whatever the weather.
***
There are days we feel lonely,
No-one here but our thoughts,
And we doubt ourselves loudly,
And judge ourselves lots.
***
But you come along,
And we sing a song,
I’m not alone,
When you are home.
***
There are days we are sad,
The world keeps us blue,
Everything seems so dark,
And all we need is a spark.
***
That spark is you,
A friend who shines through,
With you my sadness ends,
Everything is better with friends.

My ABCz


After so much time,
Building a poetry profile,
Chances are I’ve written enough,
Done my fair share worthwhile,
Even when times were tough,
For a novice to write,
Gives a sense of pride,
Helping create my highlights,
Impressing those where I bide,
Just the thought of a challenge,
Keeps me writing all night,
Like an eagle with talons,
Makes me want to take flight,
No-one said it’d be easy,
Only that it’d be fun,
Playing with words like breezy,
Quenches me when I’m done,
Right when I wan’t to stop,
Seems to be the perfect time to start,
To write something that pops,
Until the sky is dark,
Verging on the redundant,
With the chance of being bad,
Xerographically showing what is abundant,
Yearning to make you glad,
Zooming me forward.

Little Laidback Ladybug


Sat on a rock,
At the height of the day,
Is a little spotty friend,
Whiling the time away,
Just waiting for aphids,
To chew upon,
It rests and waits,
For dinner to come,
It’s alliteral little laidback ladybug.

Search For Meaning


Are the curtains blue,
For my mood is too,
Are the leaves green,
To to show my pain,
How about the carpet,
Is grey my expression,
Meaning hidden in texts,
Are often overstated,
And rarely proven,
To actually exist.

Whisper


There’s a whisper under my bed,
Right beneath where I lay my head,
It talks to me as I sleep,
And whispers things when I wake.
***
There’s a whisper silent and still,
Right now talking within my skull,
It gives me ideas to write,
And helps me share for you to read.
***
There’s a whisper inside of me,
Right where no one can see,
It speaks with my tongue,
And writes for me in my hand.
***
There’s a whisper on this page,
Right in these lines I’ve laid,
It speaks to you,
And was placed by me.

1. The First Chocolate


It’s that first crisp morning,
When you sneak out of bed,
Head down the stairs,
Grab your calendar,
And hear that door tear,
underneath is that sweetest of treats,
The first seasons chocolate,
There for you to eat.

I’m From The 90’s


I’m from the 90’s,
Where country roads took me home,
The cha cha slide was cool,
We danced to the achy breaky heart,
And baby was it cold out side.
***
We all had 99 problems,
And p!nk was just starting out,
There was lady marmalade,
And the circle of life.
***
But how times have changed,
We’ve had call me maybe,
And the new cha cha is gangnam,
And the circle of life is being reborn.

London From Above


From above the london lights,
Shine orange, yellow and white.
The trains like worms,
Go underground,
Only to come up,
On the other side of town. 
Everyone is busy,
In their own little world.
No-one says hi,
Or whispers a word.
And I judge them here,
From my ivory tower.
Up high in the clouds,
Above the towers.
They don’t know I’m here,
Looking down on them.
As I climb higher,
In my roll of tin.
London is a blur,
Of lights on the ground.
Goodbye London,
And your mystical underground.

Twitter


Where would we be,
Without the twitter verse,
And all that it’s given us.
From controversy,
To just plain funny,
And now @PeskyPoetry.
Here goes to the new page,
Go follow and retweet.

Facebook


Facebook, oh Facebook,
Where art thou Facebook,
On the web, hidden away,
Does this link work?
Let us see,
With a short jokey poem,
To test the sharing,
And the new page.

Visit, like and share the new Facebook page at https://www.facebook.com/PeskyPoetry